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Hi everyone and thanks for visiting our blog. My wife and I created this blog to chronicle our experience while raising a son with Asperger's syndrome. Since our son was diagnosed with an ASD at age 5, we've had a lot of questions. Lucky for us we have a great support network in place. And our blog gives us an opportunity to share what we've learned with our readers. We hope you find our blog informative and interesting. Thanks again for visiting.


"It seems that for success in science and art, a dash of autism is essential." Dr Hans Asperger 1906-1980



Friday 23 March 2012

PLANNING A B-DAY FOR A BOY WITH AN ASD. AND THEN REALIZING WE CAN'T

Another week at school is in the books.  Jacob's had a surprisingly great week back at school, but it's been hard to get back into the routine.  And when you consider that;

1)  It was the first week back after March break.

2)  Jacob was away from school the week prior to the March break.

3)  His EA's have implemented new things into the class to help Jacob with his sensory issues. 

4)  It's Jacob's 8Th birthday tomorrow.

We're very thankful.  All of these factors could definitely trigger a child with Asperger's to have a meltdown of epic proportions.  And with the way March has been for us thus far, I'm surprised Jacob's even been willing to go to school.  Luckily for us, Jacob's week has been pretty good and this week he's earned:










7 OUT OF 10 STICKERS

What a relief.  We thought this week would be rough, but on Thursday and today, Jacob didn't have any homework at all because he did all his work in class, which was amazing.  I remember when I was young and my birthday was getting close.  I would never behave in class.  It was like because I was getting older that I could do whatever I wanted.  But Jacob on the other hand doesn't really seem interested in his birthday at all.  We've asked him what he wants for his birthday, but he says nothing.

I love that my son isn't materialistic, but it makes gift giving a little difficult.  And of course, Shannon and I have to give gift suggestions to all of our family members.  I don't know about other people, but buying gifts for my son is impossible.  Maybe that's why he has so many DS games.

Tonight we're all going to my mom's house for dinner.  I'd order Jacob's favourite food, but I don't know what company delivers peanut butter sandwiches and milk.  So I think we'll order pizza or something.  Then tomorrow, Jacob and I are going downtown (if he wants) and we'll have lunch and visit the art gallery (if he wants).  My wife and I were invited to a wedding this Saturday too, but I'm not going.  Shannon's mom is going in my place and there both friends of the bride.  This way Shannon can see her friend get married and Jacob can still have a special day.

Did I mention how stressed I am?  It's hard to plan a birthday when you have a child that doesn't allow you to formulate a plan, which is difficult for me.  But I've learned to accept how my son is and we'll just have to freestyle his birthday.  It's harder for us, but it's easier on Jacob and after all, it is his birthday.  And we just want him to enjoy it.  I'll be sure to post about it this weekend.
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6 comments:

  1. Lizbeth23 March 2012 at 12:31

    Birthdays are always hard for us too. It's always hard to think of a traditional birthday because we so don't do that for our son. No singing or big parties, we just do what he wants to do which is usually certain tv programs and computer time. As long as its a perfect day for him that's all what matters.

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    1. Jim Reeve24 March 2012 at 10:55

      Again Liz, it sounds like our kids are a lot alike. We've always thought, why do things that could make Jacob's special day turn bad? As long as he's happy we're happy.

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  2. Karen V.24 March 2012 at 07:36

    That's pretty impressive that he made the spring break transition so smoothly back at school. Sounds like the help there is good.

    I see you so many places I go, I had to stop in. My son is 5 and his birthday is in a couple months. I'm trying to plan but he has no concept of time and so jE either ignores me or -if I ask him what he wants - he thinks it is right then and that he should get cake an sing! Your plan sounds wonderfully relaxing and mellow. I hope your son has a wonderful birthday!

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    1. Jim Reeve24 March 2012 at 10:57

      Thanks Karen. In the past, we've thought about planning a big party, but if Jacob gets frustrated he'll have a melt down. And if there's 20 kids and as many parents, we can't just leave. So we usually relax and let Jacob decide what he wants to do.

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  3. Jen28 March 2012 at 06:46

    Oh man, I hear you on the gifts!! I get a big, I don't know, when I ask Katie. I never know what to tell family and friends to get her, which is SO different from Ben who seems to carry around a list of what he wants at ALL times...haha. We have learned our lesson with birthday parties away from the house. Meltdown city. For a couple years we didn't have one at all, and just went as a family to a local indoor water park. The past 2 K has asked for parties, so we have invited a few friends to the house, since it's her ultimate comfort zone, and they have gone pretty well. Anywho, I hope he had a wonderful day!!!!

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    1. Jim Reeve29 March 2012 at 07:26

      His day was great Jen. Shannon and I were talking about maybe having a pool party at the local rec centre next year. They have a prty room for rent and they have open swims on the weekends. So we might give it a try.

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